How come Jay doesn't get older?

How come Jay doesn't get older?

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web.archive.org/web/20060427174119/http://orangecow.org/1media/sent081003.txt
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Because he is eye candy, they use cgi like disney did for leia and grand moff

How come AIDSMoby doesn't get balder? How come Rich doesn't get fatter. How come Wizard doesn't get virginier. Because they all reached the zenith.

Some people age like fine wine.

Serious question, will these guys get more money if I don't skip the ads on their videos?

Who is in charge in RLM? Serious question.

And some don't

It's the facial hair, it hides the sagging jawline.

I want to be a YouTube movie reviewer too.

What the FUCK happened to Rich? Jesus.

Got fat and hairline moved back

literally if mike lost weight he would look fine and if rich lost weight and just went bald he would look much better

why dont people take control of their fucking lives

>see a picture of this qt pie
>assume there's a new RLM video
>click on the top video
>it's just beard fat

Mike and Jay, the rest are side players.

If you see their podcast parody video, Jay has some crow's feet now.
He's getting older but he's looking damn fine for a nerd in his mid-30s.

>Rich Evans is their dog
Checks out

>What the FUCK happened to Rich?
Life.

Mike is getting drunker tho.

His fiancee is a feeder. She used to be chubby as fuck but then she got ripped and makes Rich eat the stuff she can't anymore.
She's going to kill him guys ;_;

Because he's a homo

AIDS

he eats cum

why was Garrett so autistic?
web.archive.org/web/20060427174119/http://orangecow.org/1media/sent081003.txt

How do you even find this?

Nothing to do at work.

Do you hear that? That's the sound of Jessi's biological clock slowly ticking away. At the age of 34, she only has two short years before the risk of miscarriage, birth defects, and sterility rapidly rise.

For years Jessi kept her biological imperative stored deep down in the back of her mind.. but as all eventually women find, the sound will grow louder and louder - a horrifying cacophony of guilt and regret will fill her every thought - eventually deafening even the most unfit or unwilling of women.

Tick. Tock. Tick! Tock!

Her latest disappearance is no coincidence. The flood of nasty comments she read about her exploding weight and fading youth have grown so heavy that she can no longer find the strength to appear in front of the camera. Combined with her distress over her fleeting chance at motherhood, Jessi will most likely "find herself" in the coming months. She will stay out partying with her girlfriends later and later each night, making new "friends" and dancing with strangers to feel beautiful again. Mike will have his suspicions, but he isn't man enough to contain forays into the Milwaukee night. He'll wonder who her new friends "Tyrese" and "Jamal" are, and why Jessi texts them so late into the night. This desperate search for self-affirmation and a more virile buck (no, Mike is not the man she expected him to become) will lead to a path of self destruction and ruin. And just like that, her brief moment in the internet's spotlight will dim and sputter - a poetic reflection of her life - and she will vanish never to be seen again.

A failed singer, a failed actress, and soon to be failed mother. Jessica Nakles. Age 34.

damn

>34

I bet thats in the autism zone.

>But nevermind that. Yes. Jay drunk.

>Hmm.

>Yes, that was an ... interesting experience.

>I couldn't quite believe it either. Nor could Lauren. I mean, we both figured he'd have two beers, or one beer, or half a beer (or half a Smirnoff) and then call it a night. We never in a million years actually expect him to get drunk.

>So then he drinks an insane amount, vomits seven times, and spends the entire night hugging a toilet, puking into it and crying to Lauren about how nobody will sleep with him.

>And we are horribly scared that he's going to die, calling 911 Poison Control at one point and getting no help. We held a vigil by his bedside all night and Lauren held his hand and he told her he loved her.

>It's all pretty funny now, to Jay especially, since he remembers none of the scary parts, but it wasn't at the time. But Jay was all fine in the morning, so all is funny now. Nod. I am amazed he did it, but I suspect he was proving a point about how he shouldn't drink. I think now though, he will not be so scared to drink/hit on Lauren and will do both in moderation.

>It was, for the record, three Smirnoffs, three shots of vodka and a rum and coke.

What did Gilchrist mean by this

Where did you get that photo of Mike?

That fucker Bauman has gone waaaaaaaaaaaaaay too far.

I will kill him. I will fucking kill and eat him.

I tried to do an interview with him for FF, and we spent nearly
3 hours doing it and he didn't once break the mask of self-promotion.
I was trying to get him to be honest and dish dirt and do a decent
interview so that people might actually think he had a soul. He
didn't give me shit. I was so unhappy with the finished, overlong
interview that I actually added back into it some stuff we were
talking about before the interview proper, which wasn't personal
and wasn't confidential ... he didn't even mention Lisa or you ...
just talked about how he can't get women ... but it made him seem
like he had a sort of soul so I put it in.

lol

rich always lookin like shit