Did we ever manage to decide on what he should've done in that situation?

Did we ever manage to decide on what he should've done in that situation?

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Gone out for a snack.

Cry

Should have vomited all over his crotch out of anxeity

laugh it off because its France and no one gives a shit

European """"""""""""""""""""television""""""""""""""""""""

>*laugh at joke*
>co-hosts look at you with the 'awwww' look

>"No no ahah. . .it's okay its okay. Look in my position you kind of have to be able to laugh at yourself right. I know I'm chubby and I'm goofy looking and all that but in the end I'm in a life situation where literally all my wildest dreams have come true. And it's amazing, I'm so privileged. . so you kind of have to take the ridicule with that. And then look at you (point to girl) and you're sharing your wildest dreams with me. . .and it's kind of sad that they will never come true, and there's really nothing you can do about it. So I'll take the jokes in stride"

>Yeah I'll admit it, I'm a big guy. I eat too much. My diet's not that great and I'll end up looking like Marlon Brando by the time I'm forty. But I'll tell you something I do right. Something you don't do, that you don't even think about. Every day I walk into a little store started by a man with a dream. A dream to delight every customer so they want to tell their friends — with great value through fresh, delicious, made-to-order sandwiches and an exceptional experience. Fred Deluca just wanted to make people happy. I just want to make people happy. I get out of bed everyday just to see the smile on a strangers face. But everyday I catch flab about my weight, "you're gonna be a hill soon, Jonah," "watch out, Hill might eat the film rolls." To put in all the work I have and to be put down so casually kinda nags at me. It's like I'm looking out for the whole world and not a single guy is looking out for me. My agent notices I get a little down sometimes so he says, "Jonah, come out to France for a media tour. Lovely food and lovely people." Can you imagine how I feel when the first person to talk to me insults me to my face? Puts me down like I'm some subhuman filth? You're cute, probably how you got this far, but you're not nice. When you're on your deathbed, surrounded by no one, I want you to remember me. Chances are I'll die before you. People will cry when I die. No one will when you die you rancid fucking cheese slut. Your holes are used like a rat uses Swiss cheese. Even if you got two A-listers in your room they'd sooner fuck me than you. That's how disgusting and worthless you are. Objectively, my fat, disgusting pig body is beautiful like the toasted Italian herb and cheese bread served by Subway; you look like a lumpy bag of cottage cheese. I am a God compared to you. I don't want to fuck you, never did. The thought of sticking my six inch in you makes me gag.

Elected Trump

>I'm in a life situation where literally all my wildest dreams have come true.
>And then look at you (point to girl) and you're sharing your wildest dreams with me. . .and it's kind of sad that they will never come true, and there's really nothing you can do about it
this is actually pretty good

>"FUCKING ROASTIE! REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! *shits self in fury*

How do I meat a girl like Ornella Fleury?

Did he try just taking the joke and not sperging out?

i forgot what this is from, someone source me pl0x?

Best I've seen

woah, what a passive aggressive bitch

Boku no piko

This sounds so much like John Candy's speech in Planes Trains and Automobiles that it makes me want to puke

hurrr..... anime hehee.....

You went to weather girl school, while you should have gone to films like moi.

youtube.com/watch?v=K7OVAGmymbQ

WAY too long. You just sound like a tryhard.

I'm so glad that ugly bitch explained the video to me. There's no way I could have possibly comprehended what was going on otherwise.

>he makes a comment that she's a slut
>she laughs then bants back that he's unattractive (in the most mild way possible)
>he flips out

I hate fat people.

>Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me

"france is like," *sips tea* "totally progressive and on the RIGHT side of history..." *BRAAAAP* "exceeeept when it comes to fat jokes" (no one even called him fat, the bitch just tacked that on)

Lol what would say? "Dur hur,bitch"

>>"No no ahah. . .it's okay its okay. Look in my position you kind of have to be able to laugh at yourself

End it there. Perfect

Oh yeah well fuck you bitch

>I still have more money than you, and I am AMERICAN! USA USA USA USA

Don't forget he has a benis so he's allowed to be fat as long as he's rich.

He should have bowled her over, torn her bottoms off, and munched her privates.

What was her end game though?

>Brad and Leo would leave with me after seeing how rude you were.

>I knew French women were easy but literally selling yourself on national television, come on

Glorious.

>Sup Forums gets so upset about a woman saying something mean to another man that they spend months thinking up responses for him

You wanna hurt me? Go right ahead if it makes you feel any better. I'm an easy target. Yeah, you're right, I eat too much. I also listen too much. I could be a cold-hearted cynic like you... but I don't like to hurt people's feelings. Well, you think what you want about me; I'm not changing. I like... I like me. My wife likes me. My fans like me. 'Cause I'm the real article. What you see is what you get.

Listen, here's the thing...I may not be one of your "pretty boy handsome men," but I have a good heart and my mother likes me.

she wanted to watch the fat burn

>"Sorry"
*Finishes smoking a cigarette, then flicks it. Turns away, draping his blazer over his shoulder and tipping his hat down over his eyes*
>"Nothing personal, kid"
>*walks away down an alleyway in the rain*
>*jazz music plays*

Rip off your pants and do a triple lutz while spraying diarrhea all over the stage.

>Woah, what a clever joke. Did you come up with it all by yourself? No wonder you are a weather girl.

eww gross !!!

>masturbate to completion directly in her face because it's France and everyone is too weak to stop you

run her over with a truck

Wont need a truck when you're Jonah Hill

americans truly cannot handle banter.

Not been fat.

That's not banter that's just mean

This. I fucking love it, the pure insanity

>woman tries to bantz
>not doing too bad
>fails to realize she has no dick
>bantz go south as egos get bruised

>Ha ha, that's a good one! I give up! I, uh, throw the white flag up and everything
>*Jonah looks directly into the camera*
>These fucking frogs. Our sons bled for their inept, cowardly country not once but twice. Theirs is a history of guillotines, Napoleonic warmongering, and instigating two world wars yet they have the audacity to castigate an American. Hitler was right. Every French man and woman should have dangled from the elm and may God close down every Subway in France tonight if I'm wrong.

thing is that's pretty much what she said in her apology

>I was still good enough to fuck your mother

Yeah... this is honestly sort of surprisingly pathetic

plebs

>You think I don't appreciate art? You think I don't understand fashion? You think I'm not hip? You think I'm pathetic? A nerd? A lard-ass fat-so? You think I'm shit? Well, you're wrong, 'cause I'm champagne, and you're shit. Until the day you die, you, not me, will always be shit!

miscalculated banter by someone trying to get a comic to warm up
you see unfunny people do it all the time. she tried to judge what kind of comic Hill is and tried to use stoner comedy on him, the kind of Rogen-esque insults going back and forth that end with people slapping each other on the back she's seen in his movies

only she obviously didn't understand that that kind of comedy is distinctly male and has to focus on gay jokes or weed or video games, not whether or not you'll fuck somebody.

essentially it was a woman trying to do guy-guy banter Apatow movies are known for and fucking the core concept up

Jonah showed class and maturity by not returning any insults.

He didn't need to say anything.

>americans think guns are the answer to everything

he called her the weather girl

I thought it WAS John Candy's speech and that that was the joke.

i got the impression she was shitting on him in order to raise herself above him

>I know you are but what am I ?

> I know you are but what am I?

...

he should have said

>only if I get to watch

shows you dont care about being the butt of jokes, can laugh at yourself too, puts her off guard by upping her in the crass sexual joke department and also become a hot cuck meme on Sup Forums

Now THAT'S how it's done!

*pulls out .45*..."Oh I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt. You were saying? No please, continue... I'd love to hear the rest of this fantasy of yours. NO, DON'T MOVE. NOBODY MOVE! EVERYONE SIT THE FUCK DOWN AND SHUT UP! What's the matter, frog got your tongue? You seemed so talkative before, what changed? Oh this? Yeah, this is normal to carry where I'm from, but I wouldn't be surprised if it's the first real one you've seen. No, don't look at anyone else, look at me. Look at me because I'm the one in control of your life right now. I'm in charge. No, don't cry, that's not going to help you. Not even a little. Wanna know why? Because at this very moment, here and now, as far as you're concerned I'm God and unless you play your cards right, I could very well be the last thing you ever see. So save your crocodile tears for someone who cares and choose your next words really fucking carefully now you stupid French bitch. You useless skank. You disgusting euro whore. Because this is my show now and your fifteen minutes are almost up. Now tell me what you are. Repeat what I just called you. Every single word. Do it. SAY IT. And start taking your clothes off as you do it. Go ahead. Yeah that's right. One piece at a time. Right here and now on national television. Good, just like that. You know, you might wanna thank me right about now. Because I'm about to make you a star you worthless cunt..."

>Smile wryly waiting for the audience's laughter to die down maintaining eye contact with Ornella the entire time
>Motion for the next person who tries to talk to stop before they can get a single word in
>Gesture for the cameraman to come closer
>Camera pans in
>Lean in closer
>Clear throat
>"Agincourt"

Painfully underrated

heh heh heh

Well done

>Objectively, my fat, disgusting pig body is beautiful like the toasted Italian herb and cheese bread served by Subway

Made me cry from laughter.

Well put user.