"Well thats because I wouldn't want herpes."

>"Well thats because I wouldn't want herpes."

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Heh, not bad.

wow you're still trying?

does jonah post these threads?

meh. 4/10.

there are much better comebacks. i hope it didn't take you 5 months to come up with this one.

*stares icily at host until crowd's laughter stops*
>"Who do you think you are? I am worth $30 million. Can you even imagine what having that much money is like? Is that even conceivable in your tiny brain? How much are you worth? Oh what's that, not even $1 million? Do you think you get to talk to me like that? Well think again. My face is currently carrying the conviction of a mature adult laughing as he plays with the emotions of an unknown french comedian. A nobody. You think you can phase me? Even the very thought is ridiculous. I could crush you with a single phone call if only I could be bothered. That's how little you mean to me. I'm planning on having my agent make a copy of this interview so that me and my rich and famous friends can rewatch it as we drink our expensive wine. We're gonna rewatch it as many times as we please so that it can bring us endless laughs. Not that you would understand what having friends is like. It occurs to me that in years time when you've hit rock-bottom because of your actions today that I'll have no way of seeing you writhe in pain. While upsetting, I'll get over it. This interview is over.
*violently rips off lav mic*

That's how it's done.

he didn't even do it or think about this

"I hit most hookers before trying to make them laugh. Guess what happens when they don't. I try again."

0/10

herpes isn't rampant in europe

>I'm a millionaire. Why would I care what a nobody thinks? I'm a famous hollywood actor. You're just a dumb weather hoe on some French channel. I have 10/10 hit on me all day why would I settle for a 2/10 you stupid bitch.

Anyone have the gun copypasta

Nah why

>I'M FUCKING RICH YOU STUPID FRENCH WHORE. FUCK YOU. BRAD PITT IS MY FRIEND YOU ARE NOTHING. NOTHING.
that's what he should have said.

>*stares icily at host until crowd's laughter stops*
He's not alone, people will just talk about some other bs instead of waiting for fattie mcfatterson to talk.

>Are you sure you don't want any of this? I am packing a foot long after all
>Jonah proceeds to whip out his handy pocket sub, puts it on his crotch and flop it around while oil, vegetables, and meatballs fly everywhere

"I'll pass cunt"
"How much money do I tell them to bring?"
"Geez, they were rigth you ARE fucking disgusting"
"You should be a blog fantasy porn fanfic writer, you'll do better than weather girl"

WELL THE JERKSTORE CALLED....

>You think you're fucking funny huh? You think you're cute, you think those people in the audience are laughing with you? They're on my side. Literally everybody in this room, in this country, on this planet is on my side. Because simply put: I am better than you. I am worth more money, I am more famous and I have made more people laugh than you could ever hope to accomplish if you had 5 life times to do it in. And so sure, you can pretend to enjoy this smattering of chuckling and applause and you can use that to comfort you as you lay in your bed tonight and think about me. Think about my fat, sweaty, greasy heaving disgusting body as I jack off to the thought of you. My tiny penis clenched in my soft, never worked a day in my life feminine hands, sweat pooling in my clavicles and beads of perspiration running down my face, mouth slightly open and eyes staring upwards as I spank my under washed, untrimmed member. Because I will be thinking of you.

Me and my friends all came up with this exact line after we watched, I can't believe he didn't think of it!

>Yeah? Well your Subway sucks!

>*pulls out glock*..."Oh I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt. You were saying? No please, continue... I'd love to hear the rest of this fantasy of yours. EVERYONE ELSE SIT DOWN AND SHUT UP! What's the matter, frog got your tongue? You seemed so talkative before, what changed? Oh this? Yeah, this is normal to carry where I'm from, but I wouldn't be surprised if it's the first real one you've seen. No, don't look at anyone else, look at me. Look at me because I'm the one in control of your life right now. I'm in charge. No, don't cry, that's not going to help you. Not even a little. Wanna know why? Because at this very moment, here and now, as far as you're concerned I'm God and unless you play your cards right, I could very well be the last thing you ever see. So save your tears for someone who cares and choose your next words really fucking carefully now you stupid French bitch. You disgusting whore. Because this is my show now and your fifteen minutes are almost up. Now tell me what you are. Repeat what I just called you. And start taking off your clothes as you do it. Yeah that's right. One piece at a time. Right here and now on national television. Be thankful, I'm about to make you a star..."

>"How much money do I tell them to bring?"
i actually like this one

>"I know what you are, but what am i?"

"Y-you t-too"

lmao

Lel been looking for that one, thanks.

>I would only leave once I'd had my fill, bitch. And I am a man of prodigious appetites. Your anal virginity would be my appetiser. And for the main course? Well let's just say I have...unusual tastes. And I make sure to savour every morsel.

>"I guess that's why they call it a fantasy, but I can see why you need to dream so big. You're worried that in 2 years your average beauty will fade, and you'll be fired from your job relaying information that most people can read on their own. You won't have saved any money, Mohammed will have left you for a younger, sluttier French whore, and no one will remember or care who you are. The only thing you will have left to surrender is your life."

>"You forget the part where they see you and leave as well."

holy shit though, war dogs was utterly awful

hill is classic though imo

>"How much money do I tell them to bring?"
There is it

OOHHHHHHHH

fucking brutal

>Oh, you fucked up now. As soon as this hits the air I will have my anonymous Army of MILLIONS that will be working around the clock with razor sharp wit, all dedicated to helping me bring you down. I WILL be back in a few weeks once I've selected the harshest, most clever retorts. That isn't a threat, weather whore that is a goddamned promise. You could've held your tongue, but you didn't. Enjoy your little win for now, but remember I'll be back. Tata

I can't believe he didn't think of this!

>"If I wanted to watch a bitch get spit roasted, I'd cook my dog"

Haha dumb fat american
You are, how you say, umm ... fat loser cuck boy

JERK STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEE

Laughed out loud

I would hit your moulinrouge if I didn't fear getting primadonna from your dejavu

>"Hey thats cool, I wouldn't have the 5 dollars on me anyway."

I love this meme

such a cutie, it's a shame that she has such a vile personality

does anyone have the youtube version with subtitles?

i think it's how it's said/presented.
i mean you have a solid attractive woman telling a fat guy (the friend we all have - the least attractive in our group of friends) that she dreamt about him and his friends, and goes on to have sex with the attractive friends while he leaves.

it's a harsh truth about the world and it's said in a jokingly manner in front of millions. and it's probably happened to jonah (his entourage probably consisting of better looking guys than himself having sex with all the hot girls, while jonah either getting sympathy sex from a semi hot girl).

1. RoganPosting
2. RaimiNatSocSpiderman
3. JonahPosting
4. JennaPosting
5. Waifu threads (good ones)

Anyone else agree with these rankings?

Rogan is the only fresh meme on your list.

1. Baneposting
2. Battsposting
3. Joonahposting
4. The rest.

>"How much money do I tell them to bring?"
None, honey. You confuse me with all the women you have slept with.

kek
Weather Girl - 2
Jonah - 0

No matter how much money fat boy earns he will always be a beta loser who would, at bet, be friend zoned by every Stacy he meets.

Face it. French Stacy doesn't have to play the Hollywood games. She only fucks Chads.

>"I only bang 10s sweetie, you're not confusing me at all."

Well, sorry. You just look like one crazy french wheater girl I smashed once. She was pissed at me, because she was so retarded she couldn't understand that $100USD is actually MORE than $100EUR.

And STILL IS. I have it RIGHT HERE in my pocket. If I pay you, will you stop busting my balls for real?

I hate these threads, jonah is a tub of shit and she simply said what everyone whos been conned into watching him then thinks

witnessed
also guy/girl that posts waifu/what do should get new material. like dasha anya. step up your game, or are you afraid?

You betas will never understand.

The only thing you can do as a man is ACT, not talk, ACT.

>get humiliated by literal who frog female
>go home to millionaire house
>wake up next morning and hire personal trainer and nutritionist
>work out until the fat is gone
>build muscle until hes ripped
>continue to act
>continue to write
>get re-invited to shitty French tv show
>female frog asks you to join her and colleagues at party
>fuck her in the bathroom
>record it
>send it to her husband/boyfriend
>never talk to her again

"Cash me ouwside, how bout dah?"

Nah, it's:
1. Baneposting
2. Bogposting
3. Raimiposting
4. Jonahposting
5. Catposting

Redbull me on bogposting

t. was away from Sup Forums for a while

But he wasn't invited. This makes no sense. 0/10

faties saying shit like this would just sound like bitter losers. 0/10

>Smile wryly waiting for the audience's laughter to die down maintaining eye contact with Ornella the entire time
>Motion for the next person who tries to talk to stop before they can get a single word in
>Gesture for the cameraman to come closer
>Camera pans in
>Lean in closer
>Clear throat
>"Agincourt"

let me give you a quick rundown
>Rothschilds bow to Bogdanoffs
>In contact with aliens
>Possess psychic-like abilities
>Control france with an iron but fair fist
>Own castles & banks globally
>Direct descendants of the ancient royal blood line
>Will bankroll the first cities on Mars (Bogdangrad will be be the first city)
>Own 99% of DNA editing research facilities on Earth
>First designer babies will in all likelihood be Bogdanoff babies
>both brothers said to have 215+ IQ, such intelligence on Earth has only existed deep in Tibetan monasteries & Area 51
>Ancient Indian scriptures tell of two angels who will descend upon Earth and will bring an era of enlightenment and unprecedented technological progress with them
>They own Nanobot R&D labs around the world
>You likely have Bogdabots inside you right now
>The Bogdanoffs are in regular communication with the Archangels Michael and Gabriel, forwarding the word of God to the Orthodox Church. Who do you think set up the meeting between the pope & the Orthodox high command (First meeting between the two organisations in over 1000 years) and arranged the Orthodox leader’s first trip to Antarctica in history literally a few days later to the Bogdanoff bunker in Wilkes land?
>They learned fluent French in under a week
>Nation states entrust their gold reserves with the twins. There’s no gold in Ft. Knox, only Ft. Bogdanoff
>The twins are about 7 decades old, from the space-time reference point of the base human currently accepted by our society
>In reality, they are timeless beings existing in all points of time and space from the big bang to the end of the universe. We don’t know their ultimate plans yet. We hope they’re benevolent beings.

HAHA you are French! A french whore! You run away from danger! Your tanks go backwards instead of the usual way tanks go! You are a woman! Women are useless! You are not funny! I am very funny! I am very famous! I have it my way! You are not famous! You are interviewing me! I am a serious actor! Who are you? Americans are a lot better than the French! The French are very stinky and rude, and you have proved the rude par already! If I were to go over there and smell you, then I could confirm the stinky part as well! I bet your armpits are very hairy! Harrier than mine! You will always remember this sick burn while I will have forgotten it by tomorrow! I hope you thought it was worth it trying to take on a serious actor like me!

>the incident is almost a year old
>there has not been one (1) good comeback

how is this possible
are we consulting the wrong people?
is the situation the worlds first in which there is no good comeback??? how is this possible this is some sort of mathemathical loophole

Fucking BTFO. Jesus Christ can you imagine if this happened?

Everyone needs to give it up.

It's a mathematical truth,

French Stacy always defeats fat sub man.

No matter what.

youtu.be/6A8oAlqTjj8

What you guys don't understand is that there is NO good comeback for Jonah. The audience is on her side at that point. She destroyed him. Any attempt to banter back would look try-hard.

what if he dropped into a fetal ball and started weeping?

DELETE THIS