Stagnetti did nothing wrong
Stagnetti did nothing wrong
finally a good thread on Sup Forums
ikr I'm already sick of taxposting
I don't get the point of this movie. It's not a good enough movie to watch for the plot and it's not good enough porn to watch for the sex.
Any more high budget kino like this?
The golden age of modern fapkino
I'm thinking about watching a movie called Dark Angels. Apparently it had good special effects
*badum tss*
>tfw a porn thread saves the day
>there will never be third movie
>We will never find out what happened to Stagnetti
but what was the pirates tax policy?
It's a big policy
i knew a guy in high school who would always talk about how this was THE MOST EXPENSIVE PORN EVER MADE DUDE and he jacked off to it on a regular basis
what the fuck man
...
Jesse Jane sucks a mean dick
Is Evan Stone the most based porn star?
Dude is a complete bro.
Enough for me to fax and enough for me to keep watching.
for about 2 years most parodies made by the big studios like Digital Playground were of this quality
they also made a lot of quality thematic gimmick films like "Teachers" and shit like that
BRAVO
Not as good as Meme Lover
Radley Metzger
Brad Armstrong
Chuck Vincent
Do people actually pay to watch to fap to porn parodies like this? Why?
>yfw you're watching porn and he now plays "The Dad whose daughter gets fucked by his best friend"
kek
Steve Holmes, Rocco, Tom Byron.
Janine Lindemulder is the only reason that I watched this. She was pretty much perfect at this point. I normally can't stand implants but I put up with hers because she had the most perfect areolas and nipples of all time. I don't even like nipple piercings but I liked hers. Every since I was a teen and I saw that Blink-182 album cover featuring her in the nurse get up, I've wanted nothing more than to suck her tits.
Then she ended up getting her entire body covered in ugly tattoos. She turned into some trailer trash looking mofo. My nightmares were completely realized when she got an AREOLA REDUCTION. I've been trying to quit porn but she's one of the few bitches who is always on my mind. Because of her, I know what fucking Montgomery glands are. I had a dream last night about her perfect nipples and I'm not even making this up. I never dream about getting laid since it never happens in real life either but this was an exception since I was about a week into trying to give up porn. Relapsed again today to her perfect nips.
What was the movie about anyway?
Who's your pornfu?
Janine Lindemulder.
Holly Michaels
Sandra Romain.
iktf bro
i even watched her vince neil sex tape
>AREOLA REDUCTION
This is a thing?
Why?
Silvia Saint
4ever
Yeah, he's based. Looks like Sting but better looking.
Lexi when she was still a skinny.
I digggggged her crackwhore looks.
Her nurse video was great
Ginger Lea
My first pornlove was Jenna Haze then as I grew into more patrician tastes I waifu'd Gianna.
No ragrets
I have the same feeling about Jaclyn Swedberg (playmate of the year 2012).
She was perfect in every way to me but than she got her lips blown up and after that got TERRIBLE implants. I can't jack off to her nowdays.
gianna michaels
>waifuing a pornstar
I assume you must be into cuckold porn, yes?
Jill Kelly
I had the same reaction at first. I never in my life would've imagined that I could be so obsessed over areolas and of course the only pair that I absolutely love ends up getting destroyed by some procedure that shouldn't even exist.
I guess she got self conscious from all that talk about guys thinking dinner plate nipples are disgusting. Honestly I've seen some weird looking nipples but I kind of like them on the bigger side. They're like the forbidden fruit, the holy grail of the boob and when there's more that the girl had to hide behind her string bikini, it's just a huge turn on.
My guess is that she was just getting her implants redone. Her old ones were done via areolar incision but this time, she had them cut out her ENTIRE fucking areolas and I guess she just requested that the doctor make them smaller. I couldn't believe it. My world just came crashing down around me. I mean so much is going wrong in my life and the only thing that still made me happy was maturbating to her perfect nipples. She would've been ruined with aging and her tattoo addiction anyway but I just can't get over how she defiled her nipples like that.
Already jacked off to them twice today but it's time for round 3. Probably gonna be blood in my semen at this point.
Tiffany Wattson, Siri, Gianna Michaels
This is how i feel about Jenya/Katie Fey
I will kidnap her one of these days and marry her
pr0nfu*
My waifu has always been Lucy Lawless.
trips confirm patrician tastes
I only ever watched the sex scenes. Skipped the "plot".
I don't understand why porn stars always do this shit. Nobody can replace mid 2000s Janine for me but I've always like Holly Halston. However, I noticed that she went off the deep end with her latest plastic surgery. Her face is so fucked that she could be the villain in a horror movie. I can only jack off to her older shit now or I can only watch scenes where she's getting ass fucked from behind because her new face kills my boner.
If I had one shot with a time machine, I'd just go back to before Janine got fucked up and suck the shit out of her titties. You should just squash your obsession before your girl gets some fucked up plastic surgery and then you'll just be masturbating to her ghost.
Siri
I don't love her porn but Asa Akira is a funny fucking lady. If I had twitter I'd follow her account no question, there's some gold there.
What does Janine looks like nowadays i wonder
Kayden Kross, no doubt
I have around a 200 GB collection just of her
I can recognize probably every scene she's in and name the source in seconds
Just a goddess. Too bad about the kid and stuff with Rocco
98% tattoo, 1% pointless areola reduction, 1% butch dyke hillbilly trash.
I just pretend like new Janine doesn't exist while I masturbate to the same pictures from 12 years ago.
...
Pre-plastic surgery Teagan Presley
Man. I still would.
She's literally "too hot for porn". Thank god she exists.
God-tier nips
>Too bad about the kid and stuff with Rocco
Elaborate please
good taste
>teagan
if this before her atrocious boob job?
Jenna Haze. She made me an anal fan forever.
Jerked it alot to the scene in Pirates 2 with the two fancy chicks
got pregnant with this guy, married, quit porn while he keeps doing porn
Michelle from Ideepthroat
so sad
Based Ethan Hawke
>She made me an anal fan forever.
which one was that?
the redhead?
Fuck yes. What a girl.
And she was good at fucking too. She enjoyed herself.
Can I pick a tranny? I've been watching porn for like 20 years now and I'm so desensitized that vanilla shit stopped getting me off many years ago. Porn is the worst drug.
Anyways if trannies are in, I'd pick Areeya. The only dick I like is my own but man, this ladyboy has a nice dick. Only tranny I'd fuck in real life too although I'd be disgusted with myself afterwards and I'd never be able to look my family in the eye again.
When she started doing men in movies is when it went downhill for me, idk, something was lost there
The cute tanned one, he hit that more times than any other girl other than his wife
Sup Forums is for mainstream films!
Porn belongs on /hc/!
>Can I pick a tranny
Jim Norton detected
good choice
>that scene with her and eva angelina where she says she's had sex 4 times
>12 minutes later takes it in the ass without any problems
top notch porn babe
You must be a turbopleb if you are not in constant awe of Evan Stone's magnificent acting.
>Greatest pirate hunter ever
>Twin cannons
I don't remember much from it but it's been nearly a decade since I've seen it.
this nigguh should play |Gambit
Malena Morgan even if she only ever did lesbian stuff (private videos and that god awful awkward handjob video aside). Porn has never known a hotter woman and she's really passionate and takes charge. It's great.
Oh shit I need to see that
Been jacking off 3-5 times per day for nearly two decades m8. If you did even half that much, you'd understand. I gotta warm up with some tranny shit and then finish to some lactating hermaphrodite with a dildo rammed up his urethra.
The worst thing about porn is that you can't OD. This is the equivalent of some ultra speedball shit that would quickly result in a death from choking on your own vomit.
Iktf, it's hell
The worst is when I get into some retarded porn game or an eroge or something and spend literally 12 hours straight jerking off and edging and then at some point it's like suddenly waking up from a fucking fever dream and thinking to yourself what the fuck you've been doing all day
I should probably seek help
Finally someone says it!
she is hands down the most beautiful and sexy woman in porn. Her eyes her voice her skin the way she cums goddammit she's amazing.
I even watched a softcore movie she was in and she was just perfect.
Watch the scene where she's with Eva lovia and another chick.
''Eva come sit on my face ''
Yes you should.
>tfw there will be never a third movie
I even liked the non porn scene cut more than the actual porn, yes it was cheesy, but I liked it more than the actual big pirates films.
I exclusively fap to selfies or nudists
I need help too. It has taken over my life. I've been there with flash games as well. Those 12 hour edging sessions sometimes result in me rubbing the skin off my dick. There is blood in the tissue by the time I finish.
I've been trying to quit for a year. It seems like it should be the easiest thing in the world. Just don't watch fucking porn. It's like an itch that you have to avoid scratching though. The loneliness gets to me. I sort of tried to hit it off with the only girl in my life and she's not interested. The stress too. I'm running out of money. I just found out one of my family members might have cancer. I can't cope so I jack off and watch porn til my eyes bleed.
Paige Turnah
You're like the guy in SHAME.
Only butt-ugly and broke i bet.
pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=2048200142
enjoy
>only 3 cocks before
Dude stop bumming us out... just get help. there is always chemical castration.
pills that make your sex drive disappear.
...
holy shit i feel so bad laughing at this, you're kidding right?
MM is gorgeous and has the ideal body
you top bloke you
Yes and the way she takes charge of having orgasms is so hot. She doesn't even give a fuck once she is there she'll just slap your hand away and just let herself have it until shes satisfied then scene continues lol unless her partner is THAT good.
If she lets a partner continue through the orgasm they are one of the best in the world at sex.
I realize this is probably just headcanon I don't know anything about these women really. Prefer the fantasy.
I wish I was kidding.
Do that thing from Sons of Anarchy where the guy masturbated constantly even in general life so they chopped two of his fapping fingers off. Maybe have a doctor do this though.
the plot was okay
I think I'm quitting porn thanks to these two guys.
probably phoebe
ask an ex-brazzers/pornhub tech support dude anything
What's the most popular vid?
Could you spare some free accounts?