Was there anything Jonah could've said to win this one? From what we've been able to determine so far, his comeback needed to:
1. Be clever and incisive.
2. Not seem desperate or overly assblasted.
3. Be proportionate in his response so Ornella couldn't play the victim card.
4. Be consistent with his character.
5. Win over the audience and news cycle.
I think these are all achievable. I don't believe in no-win scenarios.
Other urls found in this thread:
A moment's stare and a quick grin before devouring her whole.
He should've said
"Well theyre used to being around models, so theyd take one look at you then turn around and leave with me."
JERK STORE
flip the table, flex
They're just gonna make you stand back and hold the camera
I think about this all the time. I would just say something like "Everyone has their fantasies". reminding everyone that the thought experiment only took place in her head to begin with.
Was Patrice really that unfunny?
The way you faggots talk about him here I'd expect better
"Yeah well you're a stupid bitch"
Someone post the Taxi Driver 44 magnum one.
"Of course I would. I'm not into bestiality."
Butt-blasted response.
How? its just as clever and in the same exact vain as what she said.
>"A gangbang in a hotel? Isn't that how you got your job?"
What's wrong with that comeback? Why don't people here like it?
>You wanna hurt me? Go right ahead if it makes you feel any better. I'm an easy target. Yeah, you're right, I talk too much. I also listen too much. I could be a cold-hearted cynic like you... but I don't like to hurt people's feelings. Well, you think what you want about me; I'm not changing. I like... I like me. My fans likes me. Subway likes me. 'Cause I'm the real article. What you see is what you get.
for starters he needs to stop smiling like a girl.
second he needs to drop the "im offended and angry but im the big man so im gonna shut my mouth like a pussy"
third he should have replied with some short like "and that'd be the only talent you will ever have in you" and change the topic and ignore her from the rest of the interview even ended it up short.
It's rude to invite a guest onto your program and then insult them in a language they don't understand. Banter is one thing but nobody wants to be laughed at without knowing the joke until afterwards
This is good as well
its a woman no surprise
>cheerful joke about how he looks
>hurr durr you are a slut and you don't deserve your job and hat to fuck for it because all women are sluts and can't achieve anything otherwise
>ugly dude tries to banter with a woman
>gets BTFO because he is surprised when she goes nuclear on him
This is a funny example of a woman disrespecting a guy for being ugly. If Pitt were there, she would have just giggled. Jonah needed to stay in his lane.
it's only an insult because the fat fuck got triggered by it
>because all women are sluts and can't achieve anything otherwise
You're reading too much into it.
>*unsheathes .44 Magnum*
>*she shrieks*
>*audience abruptly stops laughing*
>*dead silence*
>I'm gonna kill you. I'm gonna kill you with this .44 Magnum pistol.
>*click*
>*audience gasps*
>A .44 Magnum pistol, I'm gonna kill you with this gun. Did you ever see...
>*chuckles*
>...did you ever see what a .44 Magnum pistol can do to a woman's face? I mean it will fucking destroy it. Just blow her right apart. That's what it will do to your face. Now..
>*points gun to her crotch*
>*she starts hyperventilating*
>...did you ever see what it can do to a woman's pussy? That you should see. That you should see what a .44 Magnum's gonna do to a woman's pussy you should see
>*points gun away*
>*faces audience while walking around*
>*french girl is crying*
>I know, I know you must think I'm...you know, you must think I'm pretty sick or somethin', you know, you must think I'm pretty sick. Right?
>*fires shot in the air*
>*audience is panicking*
>You must think I'm pretty sick? Hmm?
>*starts laughing*
>Right? I'll betcha, I'll betcha you really think I'm sick, right?
>*fires another shot*
>You think I'm sick?
>*laughs*
>*fires another shot*
>You think I'm sick? You don't have to answer that...
>*fires several shots*
>points gun at french girl's head
>I'm the interviewer now. You don't have to answer that.
>Now I know what you're thinkin'. Did he fire six shots or only five? Well to tell you the truth, in all this excitement, I've kinda lost track myself. But being as this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: "Do I feel lucky?"
>*french girl is sobbing hysterically*
>*she just pissed herself*
>Well do ya, punk?
>*french girl screams*
>*pulls trigger*
>*silence*
>*chuckles and walks away while audience is stunned*
His reaction was perfect because it showed what a humorless self important bitch he is
this is his comeback
Laugh it off, say he wasn't expecting that reply and continue with the interview.
Being the guy that must always "win" makes you look insecure. Double that if you're a fat manlet.
Literally would laugh and tell her, "Yeah, let's make that happen" and wink to her. Don't need to be clever in every situation you fucking fat robot turbo wizards
>nipple placement
He's melting he's melting oh what a world
>Now why would you say that? Come here. Why would you say that? What's so funny about that? That's ridiculous. You like saying mean things to people? Don't run away. That's incredibly rude, I'm here giving you an interview, and answering your questions, and you say something really nasty. You're a jerk..
>"Well I assume the room would be in my name, so lay off the minibar."
>Was there anything Jonah could've said to win this one?
>Hahah, yeah... you know that reminds me of a story my grandfather used to tell me. He spent his 20's fighting over here in WW2, trying to help stop Hitler destroy the world and all that.
Well anyway he told me that French girls were the most sexiest, sophisticated women in the world, not like the girls back in Nebraska that's for sure dam sure.
He said he must have fucked his way through at least 50 french women before he started to fall for this one girl who was the spitting image of Rita Hayworth.
He was just about to propose when his Sargent told him the very same women was fucking the Nazi's only weeks earlier and that all the local girls were in on the action.
Broke his heart, he told me he could never look at a French women the same again and that I should always remember that while the French men were dying and France was being destroyed the French women were sucking German dick, and when the French people were being liberated they were sucking American dick.
>I don't fantasize about you at all
the best general idea for a comeback i think anyone has said so far would be "hey i'd rather hang out with leo and brad too"
He's basically just repeating what she said. Sounds like desperation.
Based Tom cruise has all the answers to life's mysteries
I like this one
>build a career about being the "funny" fat character
>get mad when people joke about it too
Nothing he could have said would have saved him because he was visibly very hurt and humiliated. If he would have just been aloof about it and not cared like he should, because he is the milionaire hollywood actor who can literally shit on girls like her if he wants to, while she is just some french cocaine whore who has to suck dick to be on that panel, a simple 'OK' would have been enough.
Instead, he had a complete meltdown, and showed everyone his insecurities.
As much as I like this attempt it wouldn't fly. This bitch is in a room full of a thousand roastie cunts who have her back and side with her 100% on whatever she says. If Tom Cruise was in an environment where literally everyone thought that interviewer spraying water in his face was acceptable, then he wouldn't have even bothered talking to him like that, because if he did, the interviewer/prankster would have shrugged it off and laughed with everyone else.
>Oy vey, how antisemitic! It's because I'm a Jew, right? Oh my G-d, you're literally Hitler!
...
Underrated
>09/09/2016
I don't know who this fat faggot is. I don't know what show this clip is from. twice now a thread here has made me look up the clip to find out if it somehow deserves the continuous threads. but he's not even upset as far as I can tell.
what's your deal? how do these threads keep popping up nearly a fucking year later. help me understand this.
is this some kind of /r9k/ meme?
>I don't know who this fat faggot is.
dude, he's been in shitty stoner movies since I was a teen. Ever heard of superbad?
his delivery would have made it funnier
Don't play stupid, reddit.
>dude
WEED
>literal autistic faggots from reddit constantly shilling this turd event of a spic tier foreigner trying to be relevant in celeb world
>has to sit there waiting for translator talk for 2 minutes before responding
>HA H!!!! HE DIDNT MAKE A RETORT!!11 WHAT A CUUUUUCK!
no literally any celebrity would walk out, they have and do, they aint got time for some dumbass nobody taking pot shots at them, they get paid millions while the little french whore probably got paid 200k in her prime
dam thats good,did that come natural to you or did you sit and think about it ? ill use this line one day
>a simple 'OK'
That would've made him look extremely offended.
lmao you cant say that shit without coming off autistic as fuck unless you have godlike delivery and charisma
>Sup Forums still having sleepness nights over the proper comeback
Well, sort of, you could say that.
It is essential beta male shaming, and a particularly nasty one at that, so now you can understand why it grabbed Sup Forums's attention (and why Sup Forums sides with Jonah...).
>Sup Forums wasn't even being roasted but they identify with the situation and share many of the insecurities that jonah likely has so they obsess over the 'perfect' comeback that would make them look cool and have everyone like them anf heal the void in their lives
really activates the almonds
Still wouldn't change the fact that he lost the game.
>something about how she's fucking him right now in front of a million people
*blocks your insults*
>be clever
it has to be a response to the specific "insult" not a generic "lol women are sluts" shooting spree
>not seem desperate
he has to play it cool, take what was a joking insult and run with it in a way that paradoxically inflates peoples opinion of him
>be proportionate
this is achieved almost by default if you nail the others
>his character
don't really know jonah's character desu
>win over the audience and the news cycle
this is a mistake, by drawing attention to it he's conceding the insult further than he has to, a quick response and move on to something else is better. If he can't dominate it (and he can't lets be real, no-one can, it's too out of left field) then it's best not to let it dominate him.
She fucked up and took it to far, that's her mistake. At this point your options are either
a) take it too far back (worst option, makes you look like a scumbag and compounds her mistake with your own mistake)
b) take it on the chin and laugh it off (most professional, jonah comes off as someone who is doing his best to accommodate a retard/poor interviewer and this is what would win people over)
c) give up on the french as complete idiots (lesser version of b), not as good but not completely awful like a), has the added bonus of getting the woman in hot water which the other two lack)
>If you let me stay and watch, I'll help you clean up afterward
I don't know what to tell you, everything you said is stupid.
>That would've made him look extremely offended.
>look
No. My point is, that words don't matter that much in a situation like that. No matter what you say, people will see from your body language and mimic how you really feel. No words could have saved him. What she said really hurt him. Being really hurt always shows. Brad Pitt, or Tom Cruise, or any other Hollywood Chad would not have been fazed by her comment, because they know their own value, and therefore know they are far above that french chick. Jonah is far above her as well, if he would know that, if he was self confident, everyone could have seen that he does not care about her little joke, because he is far above her. It would have been as if a little kid makes a dumb joke, who cares, let the kid be silly. But Jonah is insecure about his looks, and he got exposed. Any remark whatsoever it could have been, could not have masceraded how hard he lost his composure and how hurt he looked.
It is fun to thing of witty comeback etc., but in the end if the day all that matters is if you get fazed by a remark like that, showing that it hit a nerve, or if you honestly and openly don't mind the remark, because your confidence does not depend on the opinion some french chick has on you.
this in combination with something to move the thread of the talk show along, like explaining an answer to a previous question or asking a question of his own. I'm not sure what the context was exactly.
autism
>"Brad AND Leo? If you wanted 12 inches of american pork, why not just visit a subway?"
He made a shitty retort though, before the major roast. He told her "I heard you get sodomized often" or something like that.
>But why would I leave? One guy more or less, it shouldn't matter for you at this point.
terrible
wow that's actually good but you have to be careful with how you say it
so explain why, all you have to do is give a sly smile while saying it
That's not bad. Just brush it off like it means nothing
the context is that he was the one that started talking shit about her first. what you see is her response, thats why the consensus is that she BTFO him because he got so assblasted from the banter that he couldn't even manage a weak retort or fake laugh.
i never payed attention to jonah threads before but i always see OPs picture of him being posted. anyone give me a tl;dr on it?
HOW literally how does he get built and still look like utter shit? I mean the guys face shape hasn't changed at all. He's still got that low-t fat guy face
Based on that I'd reply "That's when I tell you 'thanks for getting them off my tail' and go for Scarlett Johansson with no competition" if I was Hill.
But still pulling the muh Hitler card seems more effective in my opinion even if I find it despicable. I picked Johansson because she's a kike like him btw.
wait really?
so it was like this?
Jonah: normal stuff?
Chick: normal stuff?
Jonah: insult
Chick: line in the op
Jonah: response
Seems self-explanatory you walnut.
youtube.com
pretty much, see above
>that's a good one, but even I can do better than you
the end
>all women are sluts and can't achieve anything otherwise
Well, they are. If not for the Big Daddy Government extorting money from men, they wouldn't do shit.
sounds buttblasted
wew lad we posted it almost simultaneously
also wtf is that blonde thing in the beginning, a fucking drag queen?
kek
he was done before she even finished the joke
This isn't bad. Would at least prevent him from looking like a pussy
Pretty damn good. With proper execution this could be perfect. I think it would require a very wry smile and a lot of good intention behind it
These are pretty funny but I'm not sure if Jonah would be confident enough to pull them off. It would take a serious goofball personality such as TJ Miller or Sacha Baron Cohen.
HOLY FUCKINBG SHIT JONAH BLOWN THE FUCK OUT
Is Quinto gay?
>Haha real funny bitch, I almost forgot to laugh. Now suck on this big, fat, cut, benis :DDD
you overexplained it. it should be like
"well they're used to being with models sooo" and leave it at that. overexplaining it makes it seem like you're upset
I don't get it, what's happening here?
yeah, she makes casual banter by make a joke about when he got sodomized in "this is the end". he takes a personally and says "you must get sodomized on a regular basis", then she delivers that soul crushing banter. Jonah was always in the wrong
well even if that's true, its not terrible the ther way. Second off if you watch that video shes a condescending cunt and deserves what she gets dude. As long as you don't act butthurt people wont think you are, you gotta say it the same way she did. With a smile and chuckle.
>this one
>pretty good
maybe if you're a fucking cuck
She wasn't that harsh, that's common French banter. It was the cultural differences that made it look savage.
>soul crushing
you what
is this because you guys are americans or because you're fat? it's a fairly clever burn but not particularly hurtful. does this guy genuinely not understand he's not very attractive or something?
I DONT THINK BRAD PITT LIKES TO FUCK FROGS, NEITHER DO I
*storms out crying eating twinkie*
how the fucks does a former fatty lose his calves?! literally the only thing they have going for them when they drop that ish
That's not so bad. He doesn't sperg out and storm off stage, he just doesn't laugh at her unfunny joke.
yet another reason the jews need to be purged
You wouldn't fuck a fat jewish guy? Isn't that how you got your job?
well if that's true then he's definitely still in the right to fire back