>no set design, feels empty and lifeless
>no interesting ideas for storylines and generally bad writing
>relies on gimmicks only instead
>those are unoriginal or just bad, unfortunately ("fuck you, albert", glove, andy and lucy, coordinates, riddles, ...)
>bad acting (Bell, Lynch, Horse, Robertson, Dern, ...)
>dull characters (one-dimensional at best)
>storylines and characters are introduced for no purpose
>everything is supposed to weirdly connect and make sense
>shot in digital in a way that doesn't compensate for the technology's disadvantages (looks bad)
>roadhouse scenes (out of place, badly shot, the songs, the bands, the extras, ...)
>student-tier storytelling/editing (characters are shown walking up complete sets of stairs)
>stretched out needlessly, long takes have no particular effect
>obviously delusional and/or inexperienced fanbase perceiving it as particularly meaningful, complex or "deep"
>can't compare to the original series that doesn't have those problems (coherent/complex and beautiful sets, costumes and make-up/well shot/well acted/well written/magnificent multi-dimensional characters and character relations, music, storylines and gimmicks/creates a unique athmosphere as a result, changing the world of television forever whereas "the return" neither manages to do something established really good nor to invent something new)
>extended pitch black scenes because of a lack of a competent cinematographer
>audio issues with microphone static left unaddressed because of poor sound design
>extremely poor editing with magically disappearing extras and production staff accidentally walking into frame
>somehow the best thing in tv history
No set design, feels empty and lifeless
this pasta sux >: (
based hawk hater
Make sense of it.
The Return is shit and that's a pretty good description why but not to the point. Try again.
Wrong.
Cooper tried to make sense of it.
Look where it got him.
Totally flubbed his mission.
The prevailing statement of Lynch's work is that this amateur detective stuff gets people in trouble and is typical of people who cause others problems.
Cooper ruined an entire timeline because he didn't know when to quit. And in the end he's totally lost and doesn't even know what year it is or what his name is.
(What's the basic questions used to tell whether someone is legally sane or not? What's your name and what year is it.)
Lynch "fans" don't get it if they're still trying to "figure it out".
L Y N C H E D
I've been baffed, watched the entire thing and it's fucking shit
>bad shitty characters
>too many of them and 90% don't serve no purpose
>return of the old characters only trough brief scenes with no meaning only to please the fanbase
>bad cinematography
>unnecessarily bad effects (the old one no effects and it looked god)
>DEUS EX MACHINAs everywhere, every side storyline ends up with "And then something completely unexpected happened and resolved everything"
>story stretched beyond recognition, still can't believe that we had to watch Dougie hit the wall for 16 fucking episodes
>too fucking long altogether
>Story that makes zero sense
>no matter how deep you try to look, the deepness of it always relies that "the show is mocking the TV industry"
I would love to meet a person who could explain why the show is good without mentioning Lynch. Every review I read online mentioned that it was Lynch thing and that it was weird, so that is why it is good. The fanbase doesn't realize they don't have to lick every shit Lynch poops out.
+ Just because the show repeatedly uses the "Sorry not sorry hahaha" logic to achieve the d e e p n e s s is fucking shit. You can't be post modern and unique if everything is fucking postmodern. You can't make a plot by just being ironic trough the entire thing
Lynch fans neck yourself
The Return was Lynch in full autism mode. If you're a fan of his work as a whole, you'll appreciate the show. If you're not a fan of classic Lynch (awkward dialogue delivery, overly long scenes that add nothing, randomly inserted characters and sub-plots that contribute nothing and/or simply vanish) you're not going to like The Return. The one legit gripe over The Return, IMO, is from die-hard Twin Peaks fans who expected a return to the old soap-opera spoof format.
I love twin peaks, but I fucking hated this trash, god damn its bad.
So the
>d e e p n e s s
of the entire series lies in the fact that Cooper went to far with the case that it got him lost for 25 years and still preoccupied with the thing ?
This has to be the fucking shallowest explanation I've ever heard
Neck yourself Lynch fans
SJWs shifted from trashing the show for "lack of diversity" and "sexism" to foaming at the mouth and lecturing everybody about how great and wonderful this show is. Mostly millennials attempting to appear hip and sage. Though I did enjoy watching the show, I do believe Lynch took all of Showtime's money and proceeded to troll the bejesus out of everybody, which I find cute.
He didn't attempt to troll people. He's genuinely happy people like it, see the standind ovation video.
L Y N C H E D
Y
N
C
H
E
D
Of it.
But people don't like it, people pretend to like it and understand because it's "hip and sage". They want to feel intellectually superior to everyone while they themselves don't understand it not can make sense out of it
It's just a circle jerk of pseudo intellectuals trying to be superior
>Oh yeah, well it's good because this time Lynch had his hands untied and he could release all of his artistic talent out to the world. It's so weird and you don't understand it because you're inferior pleb
+they all want to yell "LYNCHED HAHAH" on Sup Forums threads
It looks good, made me feel things and it will stick with me for a long time, I was not bored for even one second even though I didn't really understand what was going on a lot of the time.
>be me
>be called David Lyrch
>make shitty ass boring series with no superpowers and no fights
>get le critical accleim because people say "wow, this is so boring so it must be like super deep"
>be me
can you get any more lynched?
>didn't understand it so it was bad but I have no arguments
Brainlets are the worst. Another proof this is a high IQ only show.
I swear, some people can force themselves to watch paint dry and for 18 hours and call it genius because Lynch made it
And Dougie scenes are equivalent of watching paint dry
Arguments are here Enlighten me you intellectually superior individual, show me what I missed that made the show "genius" and "great" . You being so smart and having such a high IQ could probably trash me with you explanation of the show
>If you mention Lynch in your explanation you're a fucking pseudo intelligent fag
Did you write this yourself? Just curious.
I wasn't bored, every episode felt too short for me if anything. I normally don't like watching TV either as most TV shows get way too boring for me.
But... but we DID get to watch paint dry, user.
Lynch was always about you have to feel it to unterstand it.sorry you're too stupid LMAO
>try and explain why it's good without addressing Lynch
>It's good because it's a Lynch thing that you don't understand , you're so stupid hahahahah
>criticizes me for not having arguments, while his only one is "you have to feel it"
> claims he has such superior intelligence and IQ
Ahh, the old "I can't explain because it's too complicated for idiots like you"
>be Lynch fan
>explain every plot hole with
>I t ' s a r t t h a t y o u c a n ' t u n d e r s t a n d
Because it literally is to complicated to you LMAO. No one even understands the genius that is The Return yet or do you claim you're able to get behind what we witnessed? Just look at all the theories.
If you were slightly less stupid and didn't make retarded accusations in greentext but an actuall well written review making actual points I would actually consider what you wrote LMAO
I liked it because it was fun.
>two trashy assassins are introduced
>they show up unexpectedly and resolve one of the subplots by shooting a guy in the face and another guy twice in the gut
>show up again later waiting for coop
>oh no
>will coop wake up in time to defend himself?
>will the FBI surveillance team notice them?
>will the Mitchum brothers clash with them?
>no, some random pollack is pissed that they're blocking his driveway so he mows them down with a machine pistol
I can appreciate a good shaggy dog joke.
>people legitimately criticize The Return for its obvious flaws
>they must be too stupid to understand it because it is very complex, avant-garde and straight out of the art house
>they are mad because it wasn't like the original series
>The Return is unlike everything before despite the excessive use of tropes (non-linear storytelling, surrealism, time travel and superpowers are novelties)
>David Lynch is a genius and everyone who likes The Return has a high IQ and is an intellectual
>the original show was shit anyway and didn't change the world of television at all
>even FWWM is better than the first two seasons
>reddit and twitter don't love the high IQ only show that is TP:TR
>avant-gardism still exists and the fans of TP:TR are familiar with the history of art house movies and surrealism in film
>the amount of substance in TP:TR totally justifies the creation of hundreds of fan theories
Based Polish Accountant
>FWWM is better than the first two seasons
This is completely true though.
...
If you want to assert yourself as smart and intellectually superior you should probably know grammar first, but anyway, here's why I think it's shallow and bad
Characters
>Too many one dimensional characters that serve only one purpose and that disappear forever, sometimes that purpose not being relevant to the actual story
>Too many characters from the old show that too serve no purpose and are only there to make fans feel nostalgic (BigEd, Nadine, Jacoby, Ben Horne, Audrey ... the list goes on)
>Those that do serve a purpose are literally just forced into the plot for the same reason(Bobby, Andy and his wife ...)
Cinematography and effects
>bad cinematography, too many long shot scenes that try to achieve some deepness and meaning while the story stagnates
>It always feels as the camera tries to tell you something by using exotic shots during irrelevant scenes
>Some filler scenes are too long for no reason (Character climbs the stares, character opens the door, character walks trough the room, character enters another room, character exits the house altogether = making it look dramatic for no reason, no climax)
>There are too many effects and all of them are bad, they could have rolled the way they did 25 years ago, but nooo it had to be shity special effects that make you feel uncomfortable
>Whenever something dramatic happens the roll is 15% faster, it feels like it's for some reason but can't tell why
Plot
>too many subplots
>too much of actual plot
>inconsistent throughout the show and pieced out at the ending
>always relying on the "unexpected force that comes and resolves everything"
>relies too much on "Well that happened 25 years ago but we didn't film it"
>too many important things are left unresolved by the beginning
>it tries to achieve depth by constantly subverting the TV stereotypes and mocking them while it actually does nothing (the scene with Andys biker son that is supposed to be retarded Marlon Brando is fucking autistic)
That was actually fun, but that doesn't mean that 90% of the show was irrelevant. There were some good scenes and moments I liked very much (like that one)
Overall it wasn't good
moms says to clean your room
>greentexts again
LMAO
>>im a a complainer millennial with no education
its ok. we got a war coming to take care of you.
>green text is a bad argument
>"You just don't understand it like I do" is a good one
Neck yourself
>I can't write a coherent text consisting of multiple sentences
>I can't name actual evidence from the show why my points are true
why don't you then give an argument why it's so good ?
Oh right, it's good because "I feel it bro, I guess you're too stupid to feel it too"
+Every argument I gave had an example, while so far you fags had 0 arguments. At the beginning of the thread I said that none can explain why it's good without mentioning Lynch
So far my claim holds
They can't defend it. They're going on "feels." I liked the show, because I happen to like Lynch's movies, and all of his overt oddness and reuse of tropes. I can completely understand why not only would somebody not be a fan of this style, but also understand why a fan of the original Twin Peaks series would be bitterly disappointed with the revival. I know several Peaks fans who appreciated Elephant Man, and that was about it - They couldn't "get into" his other films.
I can respect people who say "I liked it, but can't explain why"
But I can't respect fags who believe they are somehow smarter than everybody because they understand something, but their only explanation is "I'm just feelin it duuude"
Dougie scenes are the opposite of watching paint dry, they were the highlight of the season. Pleb.
>fags who believe they are somehow smarter than everybody because they understand something, but their only explanation is "I'm just feelin it duuude"
Every political discussion I have ever had with a liberal.
But Jeffrey Beaumont killed Frank and saved that woman and her kid.
And show me one scene outside of ep18 that paints Cooper as anything but a force of positivity.
In fact, the only thing that kind of supports your theory is Lost Highway, but his 'detective' work in that was out of pure jealousy so it's more about his usual themes of love and the failure to love than anything else.
>not with a conservative
You're insecure.
If the dougie scenes are where the intellectual depth hides, than it's comparable to watching a still image of a wall and believing you're watching paint dry
>somehow the best thing in tv history
agreed. these elements on their own make for a pile of crap, but the gestalt of everything combined makes for a great and unique experience
>intellectual
Everyone who doesn't see this can't think and/or has bad taste. You can't defend this cringefest.
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
STOP LIKING THINGS I DONT LIKE
Grow up kid. If you don't like it, don't watch it.
nice false flag lynchcuck
protip: it's not good art just because it has long shots of people staring silently at each other interposed between random bewildering shit and gore
>Audreyfags BTFO
>Vedderfags BTFO
>Plotfags BTFO
>Desmondfags BTFO
>Bowiefags BTFO
>Cooperfags BTFO
>Frostfags BTFO
>Nostalgiafags BTFO
Was the finale the greatest LYNCHING of our times?
What is an example of good challenging televisual art?
What was the difference between Cooper following the instructions of the Fireman and failing and Freddie following the instructions of the Fireman and succeeding?
go read an auto repair manual or something if you want everything to have a "reason"
about 90 minutes
"I am the CIA."
>>no set design, feels empty and lifeless
Well you are wrong right off the bat so no point reading any further.
My theory is the Lodge double-crossed Cooper to get Bob out of the way. Lured him back in to "save Laura" and plopped Dougie back out there so Cooper is trapped again, unable to deal with Judy. Methinks Diane is actually a being of the Lodge who has always been Cooper's "handler." Notice how she helps him escape, her Tulpa is in constant communication with Mr. C to draw him to the station, and then she leads Cooper right back into the Lodge.
...
heard of different styles?
Heard of tricking your audience into believing not noticing cheap and simplistic sets? By the way, the other points in the OP are much more relevant to The Return not being very good.
Nah I read all of them and they are all shit reasons.
Really liked how Lynch used CGI with digital in the new TP. It basically looks like doodling, quirky yet quality.