Movie about The Bible

>Movie about The Bible.
> It's Noah's Ark or Jesus's birth.

We get one of each next year.

Thoughts?

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I don't think the world is ready for an animated adaptation of the Book of Revelation.

Prince of Egypt and Joseph King of Dreams(or whatever, same studio) were pretty good.

Another honey badger. GREAT.

They should do a whole movie on how big of a sin it is to wear mixed fabrics.

Just scare the shit out of the movie-goers.

is the elephant evil?

We don't know. The only info we know is the aardvark's name is Gilbert and is voiced by Miles Teller.

Markets must be abolished so there is no monetary incentive to create religious propaganda.

BEcause most of the bible is about murder, betrayal, ruthless politicians, plagues, etc.

The bible is too hardcore for babby liberals.

As long as this one isn't a walking fart joke, I'm cool with it

>Implying conservatives like any of those things
>Implying Bible thumpers don't like to pretend their religion is all good feelings and morals.

they do push the non-biblical, Dante's version of Hell a fucking lot.

>there will never be an animated film about Jacob wrestling an angel or Elisha and the two bears that kill a bunch of kids

What hath God wrought

youtu.be/C2jmT35fygc

Don't forget about how it's forbidden to eat shellfish and if you plant two different crops side by side I is your punishment to burn in hell for eternity.

Only if it's a Rock Opera.

This is the best Ark movie, and nothing will top it.

Cerebus?

>Elisha and the two bears that kill a bunch of kids

He shouldn't have been so bald.

Is it Mr. Twister? Either that or Colin Hay.

That setup...Everytime.

>Elisha and the Two Bears
>as a Disney animated film

Think of the musical numbers!

The only religious Sup Forumsmovie I liked was The Miracle Maker.

Why did my file go 404 missing?

This had been happening a lot lately on Sup Forums.

Anyone else have this issue?

Huh? I still see it.

An animated adaptation of Jesus Christ Superstar would be so fucking cool, though...

>They will never do one about Sodom and Gommorah.
Why live?

Mister Twister.

Have you liked the movie?

>Only if it's a Metal Opera.
FTFY

They know they'll never top Brad Neely's treatment of the subject so it's not even worth attempting.

Jews are gonna FREAK.

Sort of like how liberals pretend Islam is all good feelings and morals

Don't fuck with Elisha

Haven't watched the full thing yet.

But they made Lion King which the writers said they pulled a lot from the Bible for.

Let's be honest... Dante's version of Hell is pretty rad.

Then please do. You may just be surprised.

>we will never have teenage jesus learning to use his powers and control them
i mean, hear me out Sup Forums, a superboy story but with jesus

I still own that on video. That was my favourite since I was a kid.

>it's another 'irreligious lads think all Christians are sola scriptura Protestants" episode

>>Implying Bible thumpers don't like to pretend their religion is all good feelings and morals.
I thought people didn't like them BECAUSE they condem the bad guys. So which is it?

>there will never be one based on the Book of Revelations

#Notallchristians, but their movies are the funny ones.

>TFW there will never be a deamworks movie based on the brave and kickass Esther.

Religious movies.

>2 Assholes: The Movie

>if religions were real
>if
Nice try!

Also the violent stuff in the Bible would be great for Snyder to make a movie out of.

eggs dee so edgy

Jesus should have gone full Man of Steel and snapped all of their necks.

>When you're the only good religious movie.

It won't sell, Christians will think it's sacrilegious and fedora explorers will turn their noses up at it