And that's how the entire village got herpes

And that's how the entire village got herpes.

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merriam-webster.com/dictionary/jism
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Why does he recognize that taste?

What is the name of the flaming skull god with stakes in the eyes?

ALways forget the name

Sithrak
Because he's tasted it before duh.

Shitrak

It's Oglaf, why wouldn't he

You wouldn't believe the number of women who think guys taste their own jizz.

Is that a thing? I masturbate twice a day and I have never felt compelled to taste my own jizz.

You wouldn't believe the number of guys that do.

Sounds better.

No clue if its a thing. But

>Rant
one thing I do is ask chicks I bang how my jizz tastes as it lets me know just how little pineapple juice I can get away with drinking. Most common question I get in response is why don't I just taste it myself.

Women just see nothing wrong with it and have no problem tasting themselves either. I don't get it but not going to argue with a chick who is willing to swallow.

I did in like, 8th grade.
I was an inquisitive mind, and wanted to know.
Worked out in the end because I knew I never wanted to do it again, cementing my sexuality.

>wasting your jizz
Good luck keeping gains with all the protein and vitamins you lose.

>Current year
>Still giving in to the ejaculation jew.

The true key is never shoot in the first place. Only then can you transcend into multiple full body orgasims and maintain your gains.

Goddamit Chris

Why do you have a problem with it? Honestly I think it's pretty fucking gay to not even by willing to check what your own jizz tastes like.

It's not gay tasting your own product

Sooooo what it taste like?

I dunno, salty? It's been like, a decade, I don't remember all the details.

nothing, vaguely salty, sometimes it vaguely tastes like nuts.
after a handful of times you get used to the chlorine smell and you don't smell it anymore.

JISM. The stuff women make. That term's been around since the 70's. Jizz is a less-than-15 years-old term for what guys make. Kids don't know shit these days...

u wot m8

Uh? Except in the comic's case, it's the taste of pussy he recognise, nor dick.

>Kids don't know shit these days...
>kids
Welp, I'd say it's for the best.

merriam-webster.com/dictionary/jism

Bitter to bittersweet depending on the diet, slightly salty if you eat a lot of salt. Has a strange, almost chemical smell, quite faint. The taste is overall OK, you can even imagine some dumb health drink tasting like that, the bad part is that is has the consistency of something in-between cream and egg white.

>The taste is overall OK
Wrong answer, user.

The best way to describe the smell is a cross between a chlorinated pool smell and chestnut flowers.

This nigga here has really put hard work into thinking about how to describe jizz

Dear Oglaf creators,
Please, next week make a comic about men who try to fellate themselves, so Sup Forums can make a thread about their experiences.
Love,
user

It's literally protein, vitamins and prostate fluid which tends to have trace tastes of your diet. That's it.

Honestly I wouldn't recommend trying it. It's like a step you can't untake. If you know you can do that, you ALWAYS know you can do that. Y'know?

>not tasting your own

Nice try Webster, I'm not signing up for anything.

Could do it as a tween, even though I was just 4,5'' inches long then. Any possible pleasure was completely ruined by how uncomfortable I was having to bend like that so I only ever did it 5 or so times. I'm 6'' now, but I can't get nowhere close — my elasticity is gone.

Good, now you have another reason to eat cock everyday!

See pic in

Weirdly I could only suck my own dick from May 2003 through to January 2004. Before and after that, no luck.

want to find out?

>implying you can possibly do something "gay" on your own
Unless you classify masturbation as homosexual behavior, no dice.

If there's a dick in your mouth, it's gay. Doesn't matter whose dick it is.

Gee, what a black and white outlook on sexuality. Here's a thought for you: the same blood that flows trough your cock, balls and anus also flows trough your eyes, brain and tongue.

Yeah, and if you touch a dick, that's gay too. Pretty much 99% of men go into the bathroom normal and come out faggots.

That's one awfully specific timeframe, user

Then there's the one percent that straddle the urinals.

True, red-blooded, all-American heterosexuals.

What if the mouth belong to a woman?

Yeah I don't really understand it either.

Nothing is more sickeningly faggoty than a woman's mouth on a MAN'S cock.

>Letting a woman touch my dick

/nofap/ december going strong

By that reasoning the key to gains is sucking cock.

And now you understand /fit/.

Also, I understand my gains.

And I understand why women crave my essence.

Good luck in your dick sucking goals of 2017.

This is tantra in a nutshell. The basic idea behind that being women essence suckers who will do anything to drain the sweet, sweet, jizz out of a young male. Men in turn must defend themselves by never ejaculating until they find their one true partner. Ideally women gain the most when they swallow while men are at their strongest when they nut inside.

In the meantime to keep from going crazy they learn how to edge and ejaculate into themselves. This results supposedly in a longer fuller, life, lasting forever in bed, and being able to have multiple orgasms.

And as for taste, its about diet. Drink/eat more citrus if you taste salty. Pineapple juice is the fastest way to make the taste sweeter. It also lowers that cholrie smell as well.

>what Sup Forums will be like tomorrow.

>not wanting to taste jizz means you're gay

whatthefuckamireading.gif

Also, thread relevant cookbook.

Hi Sim.

It will be like pineapples, user.

in the first place, I don't understand what people think is so gay about sucking dick

>12 year old detected
"jizz" as a synonym for male ejaculate was used in the crumbling late 70's porn mags I had hidden in the late 80's as a teen, and in mid 90's internet erotica.

No one thought of telling George Lucas?
>the music band at Jabba's playing jizz.webm

Is this guy doing some kind of highschool math problem?

I don't get it

Toppest of keks

Its nowhere near as bad as you imagine it to be, was almost able to suck myself off at one point in time so took quite a few of my loads. It's a bit salty, bitter-sweet depending on diet, but no matter what, a fairly shitty after taste and made my throat sore every time, one of the contributing factors to the 'almost'.

Sure is comics and cartoons in here.

And then you go bonkers and launch a first strike.

Thanks!

All this shit about tasting your own jizz being gay is stupid. We're not approaching this the right way:
What's the difference between tasting your jizz and tasting other secretions, like, a booger you just digged out of your nose?

You shouldn't do either, faggot.

MOOOODS
user IS SAYING GROSS THINGS AGAIN

It's different. Tasting your own jizz is gay, tasting your boogers is retarded.

>tfw gay and retarded

All this tasting yourself stuff reminds me of one freaky thing I did after I broke my arm. I got a cast on the arm for a long time. When the cast was removed all the skin along my forearm was dead, like white and flaky?

Just before I had my first shower with the cast off for some reason I decided to eat the skin, so I slowly moved my tongue up and down my forearm collecting the flakes of dead skin. It all built up in this gelatinous mass in my mouth, it was all just gelled together from these wet strokes of my tongue. It was pretty gross. Chewing on it was, I dunno, I haven't found anything with the same texture ever.

Thank you for sharing.

As someone who used to bite their nails into oblivion, dead skin had a really odd, chewey texture.

There's zero reason to do it, but it is indeed a thing.

One gives you more resistance for eating dead bacteria the other one makes you gay learn the difference you faggot

I used to bite the skin around the nails a lot. Skin got callused from it.

George Lucas originally wanted to write Indiana Jones to be an implied pedophile

Jizz is obviously deliberate, from the sick and retarded mind of George Lucas

Wow, you don't say?
> *Dodges point blank gunfire*
> *Shoots second*
Pssh... you're 200 years too young to best me... Kid...

Oh noes, 2 whole grams of protein, down the tubes.

Let's just say I've never seen a /hm/ thread about men eating one another's snot.

>spitting threads
oh wait yes I have. Cary on.

how does oglaf continue to be so good after all these years when other webcomics quickly turned to shit?

The same way a couple keeps sex interesting after 59+ years.

In the dark.
Missionary position
For the purpose of dried up procreation.

Do most people even bother after 59+ years?
I nailvely thought that they kinda switch to handholding and doting over their granchildren.

You don't want to know about the spread of venereal diseases at old folks homes. Brothels are clean places by comparison.

user, old people fuck like goddamn rabbits

Google old people and STDs, you're in for a treat.

I did not need this mental image at all.
Thanks I guess.

the Bob's Burgers episodes with the grandparents are very accurate.

I have. It was slightly unpleasant, but not terrible. If I were sucking cock I'd swallow, but I'd keep a water bottle on hand to wash it down.

Of course, it all depends on your diet anyway, so I only know how my own tastes.

By that logic, wouldn't giving yourself a handjob make you gay?

That's why hetero straight men have a handy box of surgical gloves for appropriate masturbation.

No, he's referring to Dr. Strangelove. You know, the movie that is from?

I don't expect anyone to have a reason to taste my boogers.

>200 years too young to best me

I would say "and?", but then I realised most people here are edgy fat women

I mean, I've accidentally come on my face a few times, but not in my mouth.

The fuck did you pull that off?

And what do I need to do to cum that strong.

>I've accidentally come on my face a few times

You got some strong shooting there, user

How do I get like that