Why didn't they take off as well as the Minions or even the Ewoks?

Why didn't they take off as well as the Minions or even the Ewoks?

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hey did, nobody likes either of those beyond children and moms in their 40s

Because the movie is fucking violent and depressing

not as antropomorphizable

They tried too hard. I wonder if that ugly SJW couple got those tattoos lasered off yet?

Because people have started to realize that Star Wars sucks and the only two movies worth watching more than once are the first two. People like Star Wars because Darth Vader and Luke and Yoda are fucking rad, not because of the interesting story. The world and designs are cool but everything else sucks.

THEYRE SOOOOOC UTEEE MUMMY I WANT A PORG FOR KWISMISS

Because they were completely pointless. Even the Ewoks managed to smash a few AT-STs and kill a few stormtroopers. The biggest thing Porgs contributed was a half-decent joke with Chewbacca. If it wasn’t for all the memes, you’d probably forget they ever existed.

because it IS possible to insult even a normies intelligence and porgs were pushed hard enough to do that

because they were so obviously forced that even retarded normies noticed it and felt insulted.

>100% reddit tier le funny porg shirts already thought of while the character was being developed

its so fucking forced and inauthentic and awful jesus christ

They literally only exist because they needed an easy way to CG out puffins on the island they were shooting on.

Got outplayed by the sneaky cooler crystal wolves.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=ZzO3DCW4LXw

They look far too 'researched', Ewoks were just teddy bears so they took off, and minions look stupid so they took off. Porgs look like a boardroom attempt at making something "cute" by mashing different cute animals together

because they didn't stand out.
Not only were they utterly pointless, but their "humour" was swamped by all the retarded quips already present.

Maybe they should have cut down on yo momma jokes so they would have actually had an impact

But nobody cares for those either. Not even furries.

We are sick of gimmiks.

Now that you mention it I’m surprised I haven’t seen any mention of them yet

If the movie wasn’t “controversial” to its audience and was actually good, pretty sure they would’ve taken off like mad

My local Walmarts has an almost empty aisle of Star Wars toys so I'm pretty sure the damn things took off
Plenty of Rey figures though

I assumed they had, they seem custom built for kids to love them. Is merchandise not moving?

those cant be real, they're cringey as shit

They aren't that adorable, they're actually a bit offputting. Sticking a seal head on a penguin body looks fucking weird.

Bull fucking shit, editing something out in the bg is far easier than animating something over it.

Also what? Was chewie eating actual puffins and real puffins we're surrounding him? You think there were real puffins on the ship?

We need to go deeper

the second these little fuckers got on screen, all I could think of was the merch

It's not even that original desu

because who the fuck cares about these little fucks like what do they contribute it is way too obvious that their whole role was to be cute and singularly cute. minions have personality and they contribute to a plot that makes them memorable, ewoks helped take down the fucking empire. these little shits did nothing for anybody

minions and ewoks are easier anthropomorphized

also this

Crystal Critters deserve much more attention and merch than the damn Porgs.

They were just shitty pokemon

Not that user, but they looked cool and actually contributed to the plot. At least more original than "rubber forehead strange color alien number 47"

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based Sup Forums's epic nazi porg memes kekked, rekt, and triggered the sjw snowflakes and made porgs fail.

>porg is literally doing the soy face

That's what I thought too, but no, it's real. All of it.

Wait.. porgs are in star wars? I thought it was a separate movie some soylettes where trying to hype up.

>crystal foxes contributed more to the plot than bib fortuna
This post is so damn good that it's impossible to tell if you're trolling.

Bib Fortuna contributed more to the plot than the "foxes", which solved a contrived situation that could have had a dozen different more satisfying solutions.

Yeah but he's my fetish so checkmate

explain

Oh my god.

>t. reading comprehension
I didn't say the foxes "contributed more" than Fortuna, I said that they are at least "more original", as in their design, than some dude in a rubber mask.

I guess it's also partially my fault for not clarifying.

Some focus group retards thought this was genius.

>The crew of the film spent two periods filming on the island, with one particular visit leaving a wake of death. It has been stated that in July of 2014, the crew spent two weeks on the island during the breeding season. Due to the lack of information on the number of seabirds on the island, “Long-term effects on the island’s breeding bird populations remain unknown, but there are disturbing reports that during filming, several hundred Black-legged Kittiwake chicks were blown by a helicopter from their cliff-ledge nests into the sea, where they drowned.”
>This horrifying news has shocked many organizations in Ireland that wanted to take part in a consultation prior to allowing the crew on the island, but granting the filming on the island occurred without there being a chance for organizations to have their say.
Why edit birds out when you can just kill them all?
The story team did say the porgs were thought up because there were birds flying around the shoot, but obviously marketing was waiting around for an animal to think up.

Take a basic fox, add crystals. Woah so original

I wish we actually got foxes instead of lynxes that bark.

I think that was salt bro

People liked Ewoks?
And I never understood the Minion autism

user's will rightly trash your post but I like these creatures as well; Fortuna is still better. Don't take things too personal.

>I'm thinking about thos crystals.

What if you could make a lightsaber out of those crystals?

>Fursona Jedi

I just realized. I don't think they ever called the porgs by porgs in the entire movie, or anyone even acknowledging them in the first place outside of Chewie for lol, memes. I was actually listening for whatever awful line was going to come from their introduction, but it never came.

I dont remember anyone going out to buy ewok plushies. It was always Chewbacca, R2, or Vader plushies

They're evil

>m.

They never mention Ewoks by name either.

>Porgen Herrenvolk poster

PORGLAND SIEG HEIL

Because despite what Disney thinks you can't just force people to like something through marketing

holy shit, based Sup Forums does it again. how subversive is this?! Those keks over at disney will be triggered epic style.

>Because despite what Disney thinks you can't just force people to like something through marketing
For now.

>Vulture's Top 50 Star Wars Moments ranked

>Sup Forums subverts the subversive Star Wars movie

Is there anything those autist can't accomplish?

Because Star Wars fans grew up and kids arent as interested in Star Wars

REMINDER: Porgs are just a corporate board room trying to recreate Grumpy Cat.

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that is sickening
what worse is it was like two weeks before the movie dropped
I'd still bang her though

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I'm glad these soyeaters and their tranny wives would rather keep cats and cheap toys than procreate

3 porgs and no moon. into the trash

>The biggest thing Porgs contributed was a half-decent joke with Chewbacca
>half-decent joke

>Her

i think they're cute unironically

>being this much of a newfag
luke wasn't even born till the third one

>WOT IF FAUXES WUZ COMPUTAH

because the movie is terrible

Because they aren't in their movie as much as Ewoks and Minions were in theirs. Because that would have been really annoying and pointless.

They never even say the name of the planet in the movies, but I guess all those Entertainment Weekly pre-release articles are just as canon as the movies now, and we all need to get on board with everything Star Wars

When I was christmas shopping before the movie even came out, they had stacks of t-shirts at Hot Topic that said, "The Jedi must end". Before we even knew the context of that line from the trailer, we're supposed to buy and wear t-shirts with it. Fuck Disney, Star Wars is nothing but a brand now

Ahch-To is in the OST listing. It's still dumb though.

Disney's evil knows no bounds

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*pets Porg doggie* :]

>these people are probably happier than you

>nobody likes either of those beyond children and moms in their 40s

You say that like it's not a big deal. The minions movie made over a billion dollars. Not even kids care about porgs

>they seem custom built for kids to love them.

If the film was good they probably would have. I have no idea how a child could watch TLJ and not be bored out of their mind

They were forced memes that didn't help the plot. Yet were marketed more prominently than BB-8.

literally worse than both the ewoks and jar jar. atleast back then they had the balls to make their merchandise bait relevant to the story. Porgs are just fucking in the frame like a popup tv advertisement, like "HEY GUYS LOOK AT THESE CUTE THINGS WOW SO ADORABLE"

Even normies could subconsciously hear the Jews screaming "Buy the Porgs you fucking goy!" and got turned off

I feel relatively apathetic about that.

They really should have just kept up with BB8.

Doesn't Chewie eat those things?